First item: check Chuckwagon's recipe for "Hobble Creek Hot Dogs" at http://wedlinydomowe.pl/en/viewtopic.php?p=2249#2249 . The following is a modification of his all-beef recipe.
2nd: Substitute pork for beef.
3rd: For the pepper, substitute whole peppercorns from one of them overpriced fancy multi-colored peppercorn mixes sold at overpriced fancy household goods stores.
4th: When you stuff, stuff gently so as not to break the peppercorns.
Now for the fun.
You've played "Angry Birds," right? If not, you may be the only one left in the galaxy who hasn't. This game runs on iPads and tablets and whatnot, and is the best thing since the invention of dental floss for occupying, NO! ...completely consuming, your free time.In the recipe, the red peppercorns represent the red birds, the black ones represent the fat blackbirds that you lob into the pigs' fortress and then blow up, the yellowish ones (actually coriander seeds, but who cares?) represent the triangular guys who you click on to speed up, the white peppercorns are the ones that you shoot into a high lob and click on to drop a bomb... And, of course, the pork signifies the pigs who, in the game, have stolen the birds' eggs.
Good luck! Tell me what point level you reach.
Hint: peppercorn fragments occasionally get caught in your teeth. (Double points.)
Extra bonus points: Teenage offspring get a bonus if the peppercorns get stuck in their braces. (Hilarity
ensues.)
Are you off your meds again? Was that you whom I saw marching in the 4th Of July Parade in your "fairy Godmother" costume with leotards? And what's with the pointed pink ballet shoes? Don't you realize you could do a pirouette and screw yourself right into the asphalt? 
Oh, you poor, misunderstood individual. At your advanced age don`t you get tired of people pointing, staring, and throwing rocks? If you want pork frankfurters, all you have to do is scroll down the page to "Lone Peak Longhorns". Now "cowboy up" and take off "them there" leotards and put yer' boot back on!
